CHAVEZ OBTAINS GLORIOUS VICTORY AGAINST BRUTAL AGGRESSORS. CARTER ACCEPTS INVITATION FROM MORALES TO PLANT COCA.

Imperialistic soldiers protect themselves, not against the flu but against tear gas. Their t-shirts carry the odious colonialist slogan: "Respect the Constitution".

Dozens of elder and young aggressors repelled by the Chavez heroic army.

The "glorious" Venezuelan Nazi-onal Guard in action.

The brave armed forces of Venezuela obtained a great victory against the brutal neo-liberal, mostly catholic agressors. The General in charge of the action, Alirio Ramirez, will probably be promoted to four-star General after this heroic action in which the armed forces of Hugo Chavez defeated the imperialistic and brutal forces of the civil army from Caracas. The Revolution has emerged victorious, yet again, against the forces of imperialism.

Hugo Chavez, now size 50 and growing, reaffirms his condition as absolute ruler of Venezuela, especially now, after being allowed to shake the hand of President Obama.

In a related story, former U.S. President Jimmy Carter has accepted an invitation from Evo Morales to go to Bolivia to assit in the planting of coca. Carter said, smiling: "I invited him to Georgia to plant peanuts. Now is only fair that I go to Bolivia to help out with the main Bolivian product".

Oliver Stone will probably film a documentary about this epic victory, with the cooperation of Sean Penn and Danny Glover, surely to be premiered in Pomona College.